We have now signed contracts for the selling of our house and the buying of our new one. We have not exchanged contracts or fixed a moving date. The purchase in Rhoose seems reasonably straightforward apart from a shed-load of troubles brought up by our solicitor and surveyor, including:
Have we got rising damp in the new house? Well many experts believe there is no such thing. Not a stopper, but a worry.
Have we got an electricity cable running under the property? After studing the drawings closely, appearently not.
Are we going to be charged for some church wall? Almost certainly not, but don’t ask or you won’t be able to insure.
Are we going to be poisoned by Radon? Well if we had a cellar and I went down every day for a fag, then I may worry.
As far as our house sale was concerned, we were about to exchange contracts when a surveyor rang for an appointment to view on Friday! Well that it a bit late in anybody’s book. We were very worried. Then on Saturday the buyers phoned (via Estate Agents) and asked if we would keep their mail between the time that they left France and when they move in on the 15th. Well that’s news to us because although we wouldn’t mind ASAP, it is not an agreed date with our vendors. So we are now going back to our solicitors with a green light, when on Thursday it was distinctly Amber. It had better be green because we have emptied the loft and sold the computer desk and chair, and dumpted about half a ton of rubbish. We had more plugs in the loft than Dixons; most have now gone but if you want any aerial cable, just give us a ring.
I am tuning in now to read an article entitled “Your Guide to a Stress Free Move” from an article by an Estate Agent, don’t worry just give us loads of dosh and we will worry for you. My advice would be:
1. Burn down your house and claim the insurance.
2. Sell the land to a developer.
3. Find a fully furnished house for rent and buy it.
4. Retire.